Top 5 Ruthless Knockouts by Petr Yan
Bro, that first Yan vs Magomed Magomedov scrap Looked less like a fight more like two dudes trying to delete each other’s face data from existence. Magomed comes out spinning like my chacha’s ceiling fan during load-shedding. Yan’s just eating it blinking like “acha thoda aur maar.” First round—gone. Second round—Yan flips the switch suddenly becomes that guy in college who stops being shy after two Old Monks.
The fight keeps going like a Mumbai local train at 7pm—chaotic sweaty someone’s elbow in your ribs. Magomed tried a choke Yan said nope. Yan landed combos Magomed just… teleported to takedowns. Fifth round comes Yan’s ahead then BOOM—headbutt yellow card. Ref looked more annoyed than pani puri vendor when you ask “bhaiya thoda aur teekha daalo.” Judges give it to Magomed. Russia went mad. I just spilled chai on my phone rewatching.
📌 Brazil Got That Samba Chin
Then Yan faces this Brazilian Matteus dude. Guy’s built like he trains on feijoada and anger issues. First round Fireworks. Yan swinging Matteus not backing. Second round Yan cranks tempo drops bombs. Matteus face starts looking like half-cooked paratha but bro still walks forward. Third round I swear there was no untouched spot left on Matteus’ head. Still throwing still smiling. If Bollywood ever makes Rocky: Bandra Edition they need this footage.
Also side note did you knw floppy disks only store like 1.44 MB That’s like… one gif of Yan punching someone.
📌 UFC Debut – Poor Korean Guy
Yan enters UFC fights Son from Korean Zombie’s gym. Bro Yan came in like he had rent due. Throwing clean combos Son’s grinning while eating fists like it’s biryani. Second round Yan’s output spikes—Korean still smiling. Third round Son moves forward still smiling. Man’s jaw built from Nokia 3310 parts. Yan wins but that fight lowkey looked like a festival where everyone decided to get punched for fun.
📌 Aldo, The Legend Getting Melted
When Yan fought José Aldo it felt like past vs future. Aldo looked sharp first two rounds slicing body shots like vada pav cutting through your budget. But then Yan said bas enough drama. Fourth and fifth Yan dragging Aldo into corner smashing like unpaid bouncer at Andheri nightclub. By the end Aldo was basically a sandbag with legacy attached. Yan throws 194 significant strikes. Thats more hits than Arijit Singh concerts in a year.
📌 Sandhagen – Tall, Lanky, Still Deadly
Cory “Sandman” Sandhagen walks in like human USB cable—tall bendy always tangled. First round Yan just studies him like Windows update downloading at 17%. Then round two Yan shifts gears. Punches snapping combos chaining. Sandhagen survives keeps throwing weird stuff flying knees random jabs. By the fifth Cory still moving but clearly behind. Yan wins belt in hand Russian poker face still intact.
Meanwhile my wifi cut twice so I had to hotspot from my moms phone. She was busy watching Govinda songs on YouTube so quality dropped to 144p. Looked like Lego figures fighting but even then—you feel Yan’s violence.
